"Can you not be kinder to your others? What kind of person are you?"
What kindness are we talking about, exactly? The one that you thought you gave me when all you did was greet and told me to do house chores? Or the one that when you didn't even asked about myself and my feelings? Or when you told me "You're not a human" even if you thought you said between joke? Or when I failed the math and physics test that I knew nothing about, and even if you knew it damn well you still said the harshest things I've ever heard and told be that I should be ashamed of myself and blamed me for having "leather face"? Or when you said I am just lazy and don't do anything well enough to be liked by you and you weren't not scolding me just because your mom is here? Or when you never listened me and said what I was saying is stupid and teenage years are overrated and I shouldn't be so sick of myself? Or when you saw me crying and asked what was wrong with me and just looked at me and asked what I was lacking, and started saying things like you gave everything for me and I was not grateful for it, and told me I was not enough for you, and your friends children are brilliant and I was not like them, they were successful in life, emotions and even job that they got and money they're earning while I was still studying? Or when I wanted to talk and you just said you were exhausted from work? Or when you bragged about other kids and silently judged me for not being like them? And you still want me to be perfect when I can never be! Even if you never say it out loud, the message is crystal clear.
Am I really not good enough?
Am I not good enough?
Am I not enough?
